


The Way We Were

by pavisamore



Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-13
Updated: 2016-10-13
Packaged: 2018-08-22 06:03:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8275399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pavisamore/pseuds/pavisamore
Summary: A (of course fictional) romantic relationship between my two favorite people. Enjoy!





	1. Chapter 1

"Where are you going again, Kevin?" Bill asked worried, seeing his friend's red eyes and frail body finally getting out of his bedroom in which he was for the last two days. 

"Out." The raven-haired just utterned, rather tiredly as he opened the door and got out, closing it with a loud 'thug'. Bill drove his hand through his messy, brown hair, sighing worryingly and threw his body on the couch. 

It was happening for two months or so. Ogre was acting weird, something that has worried Bill to no end. He had found strange things in Ogre's room and he was convinced he had started doing drugs again after years of having stopped taking them. It was not easy to hide anything from Bill once they were living together. They were roomates for a year now and even a fool could see that something was wrong... utterly wrong.

Bill got up and walked to Ogre's room. He sat himself on his bed and laid down slowly, sadly and broken on his friend's pillows, falling asleep after nearly ten minutes of staying there with closed eyes. He hadn't slept for days, pulling all-nighters, waiting for his roomate to return from wherever he was. It had occured to him to follow Ogre one night and see where he would go. He did it. But it was a complete failure. He lost him at the half of the ride and no matter how hard Bill tried to find him, he just couldn't. He returned home and Ogre followed suit after five hours.

Ogre returned home after three hours, finding Bill sleeping on his bed and sighed irritated. He walked on to his bed and poked Bill hard to wake him up. Bill gasped into his sleep and flailed as he got up immediately and looked around, blinking.

"What are you doing in my bed again?" Ogre asked irritated, averting his eyes from his friend. "How many times do I have to tell you to not get in here?" Though he was extremely irritated, his voice was soft and seemed like a whisper rather than an angered voice. His eyes were a bit hooded and red still.

Bill got up slowly and walked up to Ogre who stood by the window, looking out into the night sky. He placed a shaking hand on Ogre's shoulder which his friend immediately shook off of his shoulder, not wanting to be touched. "What is happening to you?" Bill whispered shakily.

Ogre rolled his eyes. "Just get out of my room, Bill." It wasn't a yell but it was steady and hard for Bill to hear.

"Why don't you tell me what's bothering you, Kevin? I can't bear seeing you like this, you look like shit! I can help..."

Ogre turned around and pushed Bill away. Bill yulped and gasped as he was pushed and his eyes widened. Ogre was breathing heavily from anger and his face was hard. "Just... get... away from me." He nearly yelled and turned away from Bill, looking out again. "Don't make me go out and leave you here alone for hours again, Bill."

"Oh, is that a threat, Kevin? This is the 'thank you' I get for only caring about you?"

"Nobody asked you to care about me!" Ogre turned to face Bill angrily.

"I won't then! Will that make you happy? Will it satisfy you?"

"No! Death will satisfy me! Okay? Let me be, leave me alone!"

"You are nothing but selfish!"

"Perfect, I am selfish alright! Get out!"

"Think about that the next time you sob again and need a friend. I won't be here! I've had enough with you..." Bill yelled and walked out of his friend's room, shuting the door, leaving Ogre inside with teary eyes. He let his body slide downwards after gluing it on the window behind him and fell on the floor, sobbing and passing out after five minutes.

Bill had gone out to a bar to forget or better... to get drunk and probably get a young girl to have fun with. The only thing he accomplished was to get drunk and thrown out of the bar as they had to close for the night and he denied to leave and go home. He fought with the barman and the manager himself and ended up onto the street. He walked his way home, struggling to keep on his feet and falling down several times before finally falling on their house stairs and passing out right there.

Ogre woke up the next morning. His whole body was aching and his eyes were burning badly. He struggled to get up and went to his bed, getting a pack of white powder and getting some of it out, forming two little thin lines on the external side of his hand. He quickly sniffed it, closing the one side of his nose with his other hand and licked what had remained on his hand. He quickly got the pack back into his bag and got out of his room. He expected to find Bill in his own room of the kitchen or the living room. 

"Bill..?" He furrowed his eyebrows and asked, not too loudly. Just enough to be heard from the next room. No answer... He looked around and his hand went through his shoulder-length hair, pushing it back and out of his blue eyes. He walked to the door after searching to every room, dizzily from the cocaine he had gotten, founding Bill sleeping outside, resting his left side against the door. He fell a bit as Ogre opened the door, causing him to wake up with a snor and blinked, looking around him.

"The fuck are you doing out here?" Ogre asked angrily as Bill got up and hooded his eyes as he yawned. 

"Why should I tell you?" Bill snapped walking into the house and hitting the door shut behind him. He headed to his room and fell on the double bed, only to be disturbed by Ogre who opened the door and sat next to him. 

"Will you tell me what have you gotten yourself into? Okay, I'm sorry about yesterday but..."

"But nothing! Let me be, Kevin, I've had enough. I will do whatever I want without giving you any explainations afterwards. I don't have to!"

His harshness made Ogre's eyes look downwards and filled them with tears of dispair, not knowing what to do anymore. He let them roll down his pale cheeks and sniffled lightly. Bill heard him. He knew he was crying but he didn't make the effort to turn and comfort him. He was still enraged from their fight and determined to ignore him. After five minutes of Ogre sniffling and crying silently, Bill turned and glared at his friend. 

"What is it now? Will you let me sleep or what?"

"You are not the person I loved, Bill..." Ogre sobbed and hid his face in his hands. Bill blinked and sighed.

"Neither are you, Kevin."

"Can we just talk?"

"No. Go away, leave me alone."

"No, I want to talk with you... We have to fix this... We have to!" Ogre turned to Bill, who had turned to the side again, trying to relax but to no avail.

"There is nothing to be fixed. It's over. Whatever we used to have is dead..."

"'Used to have'? But..." Ogre looked as broken as never before now. 

Bill sighed. "Just leave... Get out of my room... my house, my life. Just... out!"

After a pause, Ogre got up and slowly went to his own room where he locked himself inside and fell on his bed, sobbing uncontrollably. He could hear his heart pounding in his chest and his breathing was abnormally quick and frustrated. Bill knew he was crying. He could hear him and let some tears escape his own eyes as he fell asleep. 

They didn't use to be like this. They had fallen for eachother three years ago. They had decided to live together and share their love. Until something went completely wrong... Ogre started going out for hours, Bill was worried and tehir relationship had worsened... a lot. As Bill slept, Ogre crying himself to sleep, getting his bed all wet and his pillows a bit black from his eyeliner that went off from his crying.

But there were good times when they first started. The flirting, the dates, the romantic affair they had. Every night was a new adventure for them. They used to laugh and talk, they used to do everything together. That's what Bill was dreaming about...


	2. Chapter 2

After hours and hours of being passed out, Bill woke up in the middle of the night. He didn't hear anything, only silence. He looked around, blinking and moaned as he got up. He thought that he could at least hear his roomate and lover walking around or at least yelling for him to wake up. But no; nothing. He slid his feet on the floor and went to Ogre's room. The door was closed or better yet... locked. He raised an eyesbrow and knocked on it, twice. "Kevin? Are you in there?" No answer. He knocked again, harder this time but yet no reply came from the other man. Bill started getting anxious. He roamed the rest of the house without finding him and returned outside Ogre's door, hitting it with force.

After five minutes no one had answered him and the door was still there, no matter how hard Bill was trying to break into the room. Another five minutes later he did it and the door fell opened with a heavy bam sound and Bill turned white from the shock. His eyes widened and his breath was cought in his throat. Ogre was fallen on his bed, unconcious, with packs of white powder spreaded on the bed, half of them completely empty. 

Bill run to him and shook him, yelling his name, fearing the worst. He touched his neck and felt a very weak heartbeat. He started sobbing and at the same time trying hard to wake him and carry him to take him to the nearest hospital. He carried him with much effort to his car and drove fast to the nearest hospital. On the road, Bill was turning to look at his friend worringly. Ogre's breathing was very slow and Bill was trying to feel his heartbeat on the side of his neck. It was very weak, as it was earlier. 

"Oh, Kevin... Why did you do this, you fucker? Don't leave me, you son of a b--" he couldn't continue as he let tears of fear and sadness roll down his cheeks that got his vision blurry. He quickly wiped them away as he could easily crash if he couldn't see where he was driving and after half an hour they got to the hospital. He pulled over outside of the entrance, not caring that he was parked in the middle of the path. He rushed out and yelled for someone to come and help him out. He threw the passanger's door open and took Ogre in his arms, putting both his arms underneath him, as he had done when they got out of the house. Two nurses run out of the hospital and came to his assistance, helping him by hopping Ogre onto a bed as they entered the hospital and took him away quickly rolling it. Bill followed them but a doctor who followed, after asking Bill what had happened, instructed him to stay outside in the waiting room for news. Bill struggled to follow but to no avail.

Hours passed... Bill was a wreck and very tired after the emotional shock he had felt. If his lover died he would certainly follow him to the grave. He had nothing else to live for, no matter how hard he tried to persuade himself to relax and thing logically and possitive. 

He got up and walked up and down, waiting for someone, anyone to come and inform him of what had happened and how Ogre was but of course, no one came to him. He was driven crazy from his agony and anxiety. After an hour, he sat back down and sighed heavily for the twentieth time that night. The clock was ticking 3:00 a.m. soon and yet nothing had happened. He sat down and closed his eyes. He expected that his mind would create horrific pistures of Ogre dying bloody in his arms or leaving him alone forever, by hitting the door behind him. But it was a surprise for Bill when he closed his eyes and instead of bad, horrific pictures of terror he was welcomed by the happiest of times they have lived together. A faint smile came to his lips as he saw the first time they had met two years ago. Ogre was gorgeous and Bill was younger and happy in his life. Ogre had walked towards him with a smile and started talking. Soon, they were buying eachother drinks and were laughing until the early morning times.

Their relationship was pure friendship for six months. Until Bill started feeling the happiest man alive with only one of Ogre's phone calls. He was catching himself jumping up and down when they had something sceduled for the evening or any hour of the day. Ogre was no different. Bill didn't know how Ogre was feeling but to be honest, his cheeks were flushing happily and his eyes were glowing every time he was going out with Bill. Any other friend of his was not enough to make him this happy. Ogre didn't know how Bill felt, either. They both thought that they were the only ones that felt this way for the other, without knowing that the feeling was mutual.

One night they got drunk and Bill started stroking Ogre's thigh. Ogre, instead of slapping it, welcomed it with a smile and started stroking the other man's cheek, lovingly. That night, after seven months of being just goood friends, they became something more than that... After some months they decided to live together. That's where the troubles came along... But Bill was occupied only with the nice times they had spent together.

Now his mind made him see the first time Ogre said 'I love you' to him. It was not the first night they had sex, they were so drunk to talk this way. It was the morning after. Ogre opened his eyes and moaned as Bill did the same. They smilde at eachother and chuckled, interlocking their fingers and pecking eachother's lips.

"I love you, Bill." Ogre whispered after the sweet pecking and made Bill's eyes glow happily.

"I love you too, Kevin." Bill replied. Ogre loved the fact that Bill was the only one to call him by his real name. For him, it meant that he was his true self only when with Bill and no one could change this. 

Now Bill's mind let him see the moment when they decided to go on their first trip. It was June and they were out in the burning sun. Ogre was wearing a plain black T-shirt with jeans and Bill knee-high trousers with a green T-shirt. They were happy, they visited the village and then the forest... They almost made love under the tree they desiced to sit and have their picnic. If that barking dog wasn't bothering them... 

Lost somewhere among the pictures and the memories, Bill fell fast asleep and the thoight became dreams. He was dreaming of the happy days. The passed days, that were dead now. Only to be followed by his worst nightmare. He dreams their first kiss, their first touch, he saw Ogre in his dream smiling and laughing happily with him. He saw him loving him again. He was smiling in his sweet sleep until his facial axpression changed into a scared one. His eyesbrows furrowed in his sleep and started breathing faster. His dream had changed... It was turned into a nightmare. Ogre was laying on his bed half passed out, half awake, blood was running freely from his nose and his shirt was all bloody, as were the sheets underneath him. Bill was standing at his door, unable to move, no matter how much he wanted to run to his friend and help him, take him to the hospital or die with him... He couldn't move. He saw Ogre raising his left arm and looking at him with a pleading look, tears running like rivers on his pale and bloody cheeks.

"B-Bill... help m-me..." Ogre whispered and Bill felt his eyes burning in his sleep. In his dream he was starting to feel tears burning his blue eyes and running freely on his own cheeks, this being the only thing he could do, being still unable to move or even speak. His mind was screaming for his legs and arms to move, a screaming voice was telling him to move and save his love. He couldn't. He such sobbed and sobbed... Ogre, after a pause to sob, opened his mouth, letting blood enter it and whispered. "Bill... Bill..." He was begging for help and then Ogre screamed. "BILL!!" 

Bill flailed and woke up as someone was touching his shoulder, trying to wake him up by whispering his name. "Mr. Moseley?" Bill, blinked and looked around, looking up at the doctor's face. His breathing was quick from his nightmare and touched his forehead, trying to calm down. It was then when he realized that the doctor was smiling. he slowly looked up at him with a questioning look.

"What happened to him?" Bill whispered, fearing the worst, even upon seeing the doctor's smile.

"Everything is alright now, Mr. Moseley. We gave him medicine and he is stable. He will be free to go in two days." The doctor smiled more and Bill took a deep breath as he relaxed and allowed himself to smile. 

"He is alive? He is alright?" He asked, wanting to be sure and wanting to hear it one more time. 

The doctor smiled and nodded calmly. "Yes, he is just fine. No need to worry. Do you want to see him?"

Bill's eyes went wide. "C-can I? Please?"

The doctor nodded. "You can but be careful not to wake him. he is sleeping and needs rest." Bill nodded eagerly and grinned. The doctor led him into the room in which Ogre was resting. The doctor let him there and smiled before leaving, reminding him to be calm and careful. Bill nodded and thanked him once more before walking slowly to Ogre's side, sitting himself on a chair and bringing it closer to his lover. Ogre's breathing was calm and slow. The color was slowly returning to his cheeks and his heartbeat could be heard from the monitor on his other side, beating steadily. Bill let tears of joy and regret run onto his cheeks, the burning sensation he was feeling, reminding him of his horrific nightmare earlier. He rested the side his face in the crook of Ogre's neck, careful not to wake him and placed his hand on his chest to feel his heartbeat and smiled, seeing that it was beating not only steadily but powerfully too. He bobbed a little there befroe falling asleep, muttering some words to his friend. "I love you... Please, forgive me..."


	3. Chapter 3

Bill was sleeping when he felt a light squeeze on his hand as he held Ogre's own. He blinked and threw his eyes open, lifting his head and shaking it to wake himself up more. He looked at their hands holding each other and saw it with his own eyes. His friend, his lover, his companion was squeezing his hand lovingly and as time passed, more confidently. He squeezed Ogre's hand back as a reply and looked at his face as Ogre was waking up slowly. Bill smiled. He was waiting for this time for hours now. He got closer to him and smiled more.

"Kevin?" He whispered lovigly and softly. 

"B-Bill..." Ogre whispered back, managing a little, tired smile up at his lover. 

"Don't talk my love. Don't tire yourself. Are you feeling better? Just nod."

Ogre nodded and smiled, squeezing Bill's hand more now as if scared to let go. Bill smiled more and squeezed Ogre's hand back, kissing him on his forehead. 

"I will call the doctor, my love." Bill said and softly let go of Ogre's hand and walked fast to find the doctor who had talked to him the night before. The clock on the opposite wall as Bill exited was ticking 9:46 am. The doctor was just exiting another room and Bill ran to him. "Come, come quick!" He said with a smile. "He just woke up!"

The doctor ran with Bill to Ogre's room and the first examined him once more, checking everything. "Everything is alright, Mr. Moseley. We will keep him one more night here and if he remains stable, which I think he will, you are free to go tomorrow by afternoon." 

Bill and Ogre both smiled and thanked the doctor who exited the room with a smile still on his face. Bill leaned in and kissed Ogre's lips softly an dfelt Ogre kissing him back, getting stronger as minutes passed. After some moments, they pulled back and Bill was delighted to see that Ogre was smiling and his cheeks were flushed. But that was the time when Bill had to bring up something else...

"Why did you do this, Kevin? Why are we like this?" His face darkened and frowned, looking down at his hands for a second.

Ogre frowned and sighed, averting his gaze from his friend. "I was... devastated..." His voice was soft but indicated his tiredness and the adventure he had just returned from. "I... I can't live like this, Bill. I am only happy when you kiss me. When you hug me, when we are like we used to be. When I woke up an dsaw you all smiling and then how caring you were... how lovingly you kissed me... I forgot my misery. Our misery. It was like..."

"...Like we were back then again." Bill cut him and Ogre nodded, turning to look at him and Bill did the same, raising his head and looking at his lover, softly bad a bit sadly. "You can't figure how happy I am that you are alive, Kev. Even if you don't love me anymore..." 

Bill's voice broke and he felt his eyes burning as tears filled them and closed them, letting the hot tears run down his cheeks. Ogre frowned and touched Bill's hand on his bed and squeezed it. 

"I don't love you anymore? I love you more than my own life, Bill. That's why... if I can't have you, I don't want this life of mine. You asked me why... That's why... I felt we are losing it. I won't bare it if we lose it..."

Bill squeezed his hand back more strongly and looked up at him. "I thought that we are losing it too... But I don't know what I did, I don't know how it started... I didn't do anything." He whispered sadly, frowning more. 

Ogre paused a bit and just looked at him deep into his blue eyes. "You know what you did... It was all good until..." He sighed. Bill was waiting with wide eyes to hear what Ogre had to say because in his mind, he hadn't done anything. "Nothing. It's nothing."

"No, no!" Bill shook his head. "Please, tell me... Delight me on this, Kevin."

"Bill, I heard you... You were talking on the phone that night. You thought I wasn't listening but I did hear you."

Bill knew immediately what he meant. He looked down and sighed. There was that night some months ago when he was talking on the phone with a friend of his, telling him he was starting being bored of this. He wanted to leave, to escape. Ogre was passing to go to the kitchen and accidentally heard him. His eyes had filled with tears of sadness and stress as to what his lover would do. Did he mean he was bored of his life with Ogre? Was he bored and sick and tired of him? What did he do? What had he done? As far as he knew, everything was alright. Okay, they hadn't had sex in four days, so what? Was that a sign of losing everything they had?

Bill looked up at him with a guilty look. "Look, Kev... I..."

"You, what?" Ogre started crying but his voice was soft and still tired. "What will you tell me this time?"

"May I speak? I thought we were somehow losing it all... I thought we were. You know I've never kept a relationship more than a year and a half... I wondered if this relationship would last more or just end after this amount of time. The guy on the phone was Mark. Remember him?" Ogre nodded, listening to him closely with furrowed eyebrows, his tears still burning his own pools. "We were just talking and I told him I was wondering if I was starting getting bored or even tired of this, as I did with any other relationship of mine. I came to realise you are nothing like those past loves of mine, Kevin. You are different. I saw years were passing and I was only wondering... would this last or should I get ready for the end? Like all the other times... The truth is that I felt kind of bored but... I'm human being. I am not perfect. Nobody is. Then you started getting out. I didn't know where you were, you were hiding stuff from me. It was then that I asked myself if you were getting tired of me. And it all got worse..."

Ogre was listening with even more tears in his eyes. That's what happened... Ogre heard Bill saying all those stuff on the phone. Without telling him anything and without discussing it, he just concluded that Bill had stopped loving him. He started getting out and reunited with an old friend of his whom he stopped seeing when he quitted doing drugs many years ago. That friend of his got him in trouble once more in his life by giving him cocaine for the first time after years. At first, Ogre withdrew his hand but his friend insisted by just holding his hand opened with the little pack of the white powder for him to take. Ogre had let some moments pass before he let his trembling hand touch this again after so long. It kind of felt good. He felt light and he didn't know why. He returned home and started it all over again after all his struggle to quit. He didn't want to live like this. Not with Bill in someone else's arms at night. Not without him...

"We should have talked..." Ogre whispered bitterly, looking at his hands after withdrowing the hand that held Bill's own and rested them both on his lap.

"I asked you so many times... You didn't want to talk. You just left." Bill said sadly.

"I was afraid."

"Afraid of what?"

"Afraid, Bill... Scared shitless that you would confirm it for me. That you'd say all this is true and you didn't love me anymore. You say it's stupid to die for love? I don't know if it is but I would die if I didn't have the most important person being with me in my life..." 

Bill was frowning. He knew what Ogre meant and he felt the same. "We almost ruined it because we didn't talk. If we had..." 

Ogre sniffled and frowned more, letting more tears run down his cheeks and held Bill's hand in his once more, stroking it. "I love you..." Ogre said after a pause, really meaning it and Bill looked up at him, smiling.

"I love you too, Kev." He got up and leaned forward, capturing his lips with Ogre's and the latter returned the loving kiss, deepening it and kissing him hard, licking each other's lips and making loving sounds before pulling back just sligthly, their noses nearly touching. Both their cheeks were fluched and their eyes glowing. "I saw that you are not like my previous relationships... It won't last only a year... Only a lifetime."

Bill grinned and Ogre did the same, his wet from tears face and eyes now lit up with happiness upon seeing how sencere Bill was. He meant it and that's what Ogre needed to hear and be sure about. "A lifetime? That's a lot!"

Bill smirked teasingly. "You want less?"

Ogre giggled and kept his arms wrapped around Bill's neck, keeping him close to his gorgeous face. "With you? I want even more!"

"That's my baby!" Bill grinned and kissed him again smiling more and moaning into the kiss as Ogre kissed him back passionately, causing Bill to sit next to him on the bed as they kissed. "I love you, Kevin, my love." Bill whispered as they pecked each other's lips. "Forgive me, my sweetheart..."

"I love you too, my heart. Forgive me too, love..."


	4. Chapter 4

Bill and Ogre returned home the next day. Ogre was tired from the experience but that didn't stop him from being smiley and happy to be home and also to have his relationship with Bill restored. Bill was happy again. All his stress about his lover and friend was long gone and they were both ready to make a new start. 

As soon as Ogre entered his room, he found the sheets all bloody with remnants of cocaine all over the pillows and on many other parts of the room. He frowned. It would be difficult to stay away from drugs, no matter how much he believed that his love with Bill would erase all difficulties and bad habbits. He walked closer to his bed slowly and sighed, looking down at it. Bill, of course, hadn't retunred home after his friend's crisis that night and the house had remained messy, the blood on the sheets had dried hours and hours ago, leaving a scent of sadness and sorrow in the air. Bill followed him and stood behind him, pressing his lips together a bit and frowning, walking up to him and placing his hands on his lover's shoulders, keeping him close. 

"It will be over, Kevin. We will go through this together. I'm with you now." He smiled gently as his friend turned to look at him with a calming smile of agreement and nodded, placing his own hand on his friend's.

"I know..." Ogre whispered. "It will be difficult though."

"It will be, my love. But I will help you through it." He smiled at him, hugging him from behind, feeling Ogre's body pressing gently against his as he snuggled his partner.

Things resulted to Bill kissing his neck softly, leaving a wet trail behind as he moved up on his lover's lips. Ogre's reply to it was positive as he moaned and closed his eyes, hissing out in pleasure as he felt the actor's hand cupping his buldge. Ogre moaned more and felt his erection growing and throbbing against the other's hand as he rubbed more and more, Bill's other hand resting on his own buldge, rubbing and stroking. Bill could feel his erection hardening too. He unzipped his pants and pulled down his panties, followed by his shirt and shoes, taking the singer's clothes off after his own, Ogre having removed his shirt already and unzipped his jeans. 

Before they knew it, Bill was rubbing his throbbing tip against Ogre's ass crack as the latter was on his bloody bed with spread legs and his own erection being stroked manicly in Bill's hand, leaking with precum. Moans and breathless groans could be heard echoing all over the house. As the preparation ended, Bill burried his lead into Ogre's ass slowly, making the other cry out in pleasure as the first built up his thrusting, feeling Ogre's hips bucking into his hand to match his own pace.

"Fu-fuck... Bill..." Ogre hissed out as Bill drove deeper and deeper in him, making Ogre cry out more and more.

Bill got faster and deeper, pumping his friend and lover's dick more, brushing his thumb on the leaking tip of Ogre's uber sensitive dick and groaning as his climax came hard after only a couple of minutes, leaning in to kiss Ogre's lips hard to stop from crying. He chuckled into the kiss as he felt the singer's erection and balls tightening into his hand and a gasp came from the raven-haired man as he came all over his lover's hand at the same time with Bill's climax. They squealed out but their lips kept pressing on each other, their tongues clashing and rubbing on one another manicly. Ogre gasped hard as he felt the other's semen hitting him deeply and smiled against his lips, making Bill chuckle. 

Bill pulled a bit back to look at him and stroked his face gently, kissing the tip of his nose and making Ogre giggle cutely. 

"After all this time..." Bill whispered breathlessly, still panting and still buried inside his lover.

Ogre nodded and chuckled. "It still feels amazing... I had... missed it... so much."

It made Bill melt and smile more as he leaned over to kiss him and slowly pulled out, making the singer jump a bit as aftershocks from the sexual action cursed through his body.

They stayed there with interlocked fingers, one next to the other and slept peacefully, their lips toughing gently as if kissing softly and lovingly in their sleep.

It wouldn't last long though. A week later, Ogre got out and was missing for hours more than he should. Bill tried to think calmly and not stress himself but that was impossible as Ogre had told him that he would be back until nine at night and it was two in the morning. Ogre hadn't called or let anyone know the reason he was late and Bill had worried a lot by then. He didn't have any other choice than to go out and look for him. Where did he say he would go again? He had no idea, Ogre had only told him he would go out and would be back at nine. Bill cursed himself a lot of times that he didn't ask him where he would be. He was stupid to trust him once more. Addiction does this to people. When they feel it burning in their bodies and minds, the only thing they need is to satisfy it at any cost. 

He knew that if he told Bill where he would be, he would be easily found. He wanted to be alone, he needed to. Was it his old friend to blame? Was it he himself for letting past addictions and habbits return in his now peaceful life? Or was it both? He didn't know exactly what made him think that his life would be better if he started over.

Bill tried to call him at least thirty times but his phone wouldn't answer. So he got in his car and drove all over the city, trying to think where could his lover be at that hour of the day. He found him an hour and twenty minutes later, with his old friend on a sidewalk close to the subway. He could tell that Ogre was high on something. He didn't know what it was until he saw some white powder messing up his nose. Ogre was too far gone to notice that Bill was standing nearly in front of him and his friend had just stood up, kicking Ogre at his side gently as if to wake him up. 

"Seems you don't care to really hide what you do, right Kev?" Bill asked and Ogre jumped a bit, finally opening his red eyes and gasping, trying to get up but he stumbled. His friend helped him up as Bill watched.

"B-Bill... I can.. explain..." He trailed off, only a whisper coming out of his mouth.

"Explain what?!" Bill shouted, his angered voice echoing around the subway station. No one was coming or going at that hour of the night as the station was closed and they were sitting next to the stairs of it, cold and high as fuck. 

"It's hard... You know that..." Ogre whispered again.

Bill shook his head. "I was willing to help you. You nearly took your fucking life with this shit!!" He shouted once more. "You haven't learned anything? Are you that stupid?!"

Ogre was breathing heavily as anger started rising in him and his friend rolled his eyes a bit. Ogre then tunred to him and smiled calmly, making Bill raise an eyebrow and lean a bit closer. 

"You can go now, I will be fine.." Ogre whispered gently and smiled some more at his friend who winked at him and smirked. 

"Are you sure?" He asked. Ogre nodded. His friend nodded back, turning his back and leaving them alone in the dark.

Ogre turned to Bill, growling a bit. "What are you doing here? You think I'm a little baby?"

Bill blinked startled. "Are you serious?! I'm looking for you for hours, I find you here with fucking cocaine in your nose, hanging out with this 'friend' of yours, that God knows if he really is a friend and not a secret boyfriend, and you talk to me this way? I try to help you."

"You wanna help me? Then get the fuck out of here and stop acting as if I'm a small child." He shouted his last words, shoving Bill back. Bill nearly feel over but kept his balance and looked at his lover wide-eyed.

"Really... That shit has gotten deep into your mind, controlling whatever you do and say, right? Come with me, Kev..." He reached out to take his hand but Ogre pushed him back once more, seeing him falling on the cold sidewalk with a whimper of pain. 

"How many times do I have to say it? Leave me alone!" Ogre shouted again.

Bill got up and glared at him, pausing for a minute before walking up to him and slapping him hard across his pale face. Ogre yulped and grabbed his cheek, looking at Bill hurtfully, frowning. Bill was pressing his lips tightly together from the anger.

"If you are ready to die, don't even call me to come and see you or support you. I hate you. You fucking ungrateful creature!" Bill spat his words at him and turned to leave.

Ogre was speechless for a minute before sitting back down and staying there crying for a few hours. When he decided to go home, he found Bill sleeping on his own bed. Ogre sighed and changed, slipping into Bill's bed to lay beside him but just then the latter woke up, glaring up at him. 

"What happened? Did your lover get bored of you and you returned to me?" Bill asked bitterly.

"How can you even think that he is my lover?" 

"Seriously? I come to find you and not only do you smile at him while you seem angry with me, but he also winks at you and you have a little cutie chat before he leaves. How would you call that if not betrayal?" Bill felt furious with Ogre.

"He is only my friend, okay? We... You know that we used to date when I was in my mid-twenties but now I'm with you. No one can part us."

"Cut the shit, Kevin, okay? 'No one can part us' my ass! This shit, what you do parts us, it has already parted us! But of course, you're too high to even think that!" Ogre paused, frowning. He knew Bill was right. What could he say to make things better? Bill sighed and turned on his other side. "Leave me alone to sleep. Go away, go sleep or... whatever you wanna do."

"Don't you care if I go out again? Will you really let me do whatever I want?" Ogre frowned more. 

Bill didn't answer. Ogre pulled his hair to make him turn and face him, making Bill angry enough to punch his lover hard and Ogre gasped, falling on the floor.

"Don't you even dare touch me again, or else cocaine won't have the time to kill you! I will do it instead! Get lost! Out of my sight!" Bill shouted at him, watching Ogre trying to scoop the blood escaping from his nose with his hand, getting it messy and bloody.

"You... you don't love me anymore...?" Ogre whimpered, letting tears run down his face.

"You wanted it this way. I tried to fucking help and I fucking agreed with you a thousand times that it wouldn't be easy. And then again, I stayed with you to support you! And what do you do? Run off with your ex-lover and friend to get more drugs and ignore the fact that I love you and want you to be alright!"

"Drugs have nothing to do with my love for you!" Ogre screamed out, sobbing and making Bill's heart drop in his chest. 

Bill felt infuriated but he couldn't ignore the fact that he trully loved Ogre. His heart was melting for him. Even that night, when he returned home, high on cocaine, trying to talk things out with Bill instead of letting what happened kill their relationship, Bill felt like hugging him and kissing him until their lips hurt or even bled from the whole nipping. When he opened his eyes and saw him there. Deep down that was what Bill was praying for. He was trembling at the thought that Ogre would return and not even make the effort to open his door to see if he was asleep or say something, even just look at him. When he opened his blue eyes and saw Ogre beside him, the first urge he felt was to grab him, hug and kiss him, then stroke his raven black hair and, why not, make love to him later on. But then his anger took over and he remembered why he felt that betrayed.

"Get out of my room." Bill whispered, trying not to continue the fight, knowing it wouldn't end well. "OUT!!" He screamed.

Ogre jumped at the scream and got up, sniffling and trembling from the sobbing, walking to the door like a beaten up puppy and shooting a last look at his lover. He couldn't look more hurt and scared if he tried. Bill averted his eyes from him, not able to see him like this, knowing his heart would melt at the sight of his crying love. Ogre sniffled and opened the door, getting out and closing it behind him, walking up to his own bedroom. 

Bill stayed there on his bed, pressing his lips tightly together to keep from crying. After a minute, he couldn't hold them in anymore, letting it all out and crying silently after falling on his pillows, much like Ogre did on his own pillow.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning, Ogre woke up, his eyes burning from the oceans of tears he had spilled the previous night, crying himself to sleep. he rubbed them, finding out hos badly they hurt from crying and the influence of drugs too. His head was heavy, he had a bad headache but this didn't stop him from getting up and slwoly walking to Bill's room, hesitating for a few minutes before knocking on the door. As he didn't get any answer, he opened the door, finding bill sleeping still. He rolled his eyes a bit and walked into the room soundlessly, trying not to wake his friend and lover up after what had happened between them last night. He couldn't know what would happen if Bill woke up, finding him next to him after telling him that he didn't want to see him again in his life. 

Ogre sat very carefully down on the side of the bed, watching Bill sleeping on his stained with now dry tears pillow, the raven haired man frowning at the sight of it. 

"Where you crying too?" Ogre whispered softly, sniffling, feeling tears stinging his blue and grey eyes, putting a hand on his mouth and nose, squeezing his eyes shut as he felt unable to hold his tears in. He let them roll on his pale cheeks, for some minutes, before opening his eyes again, seeing that Bill hadn't moved at all, only breathing peacefully into his sleep. God knows what he was dreaming of. 

The Industrial singer leaned slowly and softly forth, reaching out to let his trembling hand be placed on the actor's brown hair, softly stroking and passing his long fingers into it, pushing it back and stroking it more, feeling as if he had missed it a lot. "You didn't mean it, did you? That you don't want to see me again..." He whispered and cried more, trying his best not to wake Bill up. 

But Bill did wake up slowly, smiling a bit before opening his eyes, his expression hardening as he saw Ogre above him. The raven haired man gasped as he saw he woke his lover up and withdrew back a bit, pulling his hand back with him suddenly, looking down at him worriedly, not knowing what would happen now. 

"What the hell are you doing here, Kevin?" Bill snapped at him and sat up, propping himself up with his elbows, looking dead at his lover. 

"You... I'm sorry, I woke you up... I--"

"You are stupid, didn't I tell you that I don't want to see you again!" Bill shouted, waking up completely pretty fast. 

Ogre let out more tears and sobbed a bit. "Why are you doing this to me..." He whined between sobs.

"/I/ am doing this to you?" Bill narrowed his eyes and shot out of his bed, standing in front of Ogre with a posture that said that he was soon to strike him. "Stop being a fucking baby and get real. I'm so fucking tired of your little tantrums. Either sort your mind out or leave. Leave, Kevin, I don't want you to be here at the moment."

Ogre shot up and grabbed Bill while sobbing, his hand holding the nack of Bill's neck as the other grabbed his forearm. "Don't you see what you're doing? You are driving me away from you! You fucker, you are the one that kicks me out of your life with what you do. That's why I did what I did again." 

Bill hissed out and greeted his teeth tightly. "We were just fine when you started again. And if you think that the things you told me last night were just out of the drig influence, I tell you that I knwo better than that, fucking asshole! You want everything for yourself! Well, you can't have this!" He pushed him off of him, causing him to drop on the bed and pointed at himself. "You can't have me, you lost me, buddy!"

Ogre was shaking his head negatively, not believing what Bill was telling him, his eyebrows furrowing. "I didn't lose you, no... Tell me you don't mean this..." he whispered as he cried more for his love. 

Bill crossed his arms in front of him and nodded, having a look of complete anger on his face. "Hm hm, you did lose me, Kevin." Tears gathered in his eyes as he talked, trying his best not to let them fall. Ogre noticed it though.

"Bill... Look, you are crying too... You cried yourself to sleep last night, you love me, my heart. You love me and I love you too, way too bad to let this happen. Why leave you? I don't want to leave you!" He shouted his last sentence and he got up, their bodies only inches from eahcother. His expression was soft but he held Bill's arms and shook him as if to wake him up. "This is not us!"

"No! This is not us, and it's your fucking fault!" Bill screamed, letting tears unwillingly fall from his blue eyes and spill on his cheeks. He took a deep shakey breath and tried to starighten up. "Get out..."

Ogre shook his head. "No... I'm not going anywhere, if it's my fault, /I/ will fucking fix it and get you back." 

"Yeah, fucking ace!" Bill scoffed and pushed Ogre's hands off of him. "You tell me this every time, that you will change! Know what? I'm sick of your bullshit, if you can't change, tell me so that I can move on with my life."

"Have you been listening to me?!"

"Exactly! I have been listening quite well to know that all this is bullshit!" Bull screamed back at him and gave in, sobbing in fear that he would lose his love for good and also desperation, not wanting to hide his true emotions after all this time. "It's so hard... Stop torturing me..."

"I torture you?! How..?" Ogre asked sobbing. "Am I so tiring and saddening for you then?"

Bill shook his head, more tears falling all over his face, rolling down his neck. "No, baby... I just-- I love you... I'm losing you..."

The singer shook his head too and his eyes got worried. "No, my love... You're not losing me... See? I knew you didn't mean this. You do love me, don't you?" Ogre shirped, smiling a bit and getting his face closer to Bill's, holding his face into his hands lightly, stroking his nose with his own.

Bill sobbed a bit, part of it from the whole pressure, part of it from the happiness of having his love like this. He really wanted him, he never meant any of the words he told him about leaving him, walking out of his life. Never. Bill chuckled and smiled into his crying, making Ogre giggle a bit. Bill kissed Ogre's nose and looked at him. "What do you think, stupid? Can I not love you?"

Ogre grinned and kissed him deeply, Bill kissing him back eagerly. "I knew it... I knew you never meant it, I felt it wasn't true. I love you so much. I'm sorry... I won't see him again, I promise. I swear, baby."

Bill grinned back and his cheeks flushed on a day that he thought would be the saddest of his life. On that day, he got his love back. "And I love you... I could never live without you in my life, you brighten it up." He said grinning more.

Ogre hugged him tightly and let his hand slip down slowly, gently and lovingly cupping Bill's butt, making Bill moan and pull back to look at him. 

"Baby, you have no idea how much I missed you." Ogre smiled at him as he talked, justifying his gesture. 

Bill grinned and hugged him again, letting his hands roam around his back, holding him tightly against him, soon chuckling and blushing as he felt his lover's erection growing against his, his own following soon after. "I missed you too, sexy." He hissed out as Ogre smiled more, nice, happy content and hard for him.


End file.
